Advice for Getting Rid of Stalkers

Many women have problems with stalkers and while some stalkers are harmless, others might be very dangerous. The stalker might have seen or met you at a party, work, school or any other place. If you think you are being stalked by someone, you need to take action because your life can depend on it. Please read the advice below.

10 STEPS TO TAKE AGAINST STALKERS

Get Help - One of the first things you’ll want to do is talk about this stalking with as many close friends and family as you’re comfortable with. Enlist their help, provide yourself with a sort of human shield, extra pairs of eyes minding your home, etc.
Be Unpredictable - Try to avoid sticking too closely to a set routine that he can observe. In cases where you have to stick to a set schedule (school, work, yoga class) make arrangements to go with friends. Use different routes to get there. This could be the perfect time to take the plunge and try out that new ‘do or hair color you’ve been eyeing.
Change Contact Info - Phone number (unlisted, of course), email accounts; consider using a post office box if you haven’t already got one.
Learn the Local Laws - Find out what constitutes stalking in your jurisdiction, what your legal recourse is in case you need to take that route.
Don’t Accept Gifts or Packages - He may not seem the dangerous type at first, but he obviously hasn’t gotten the message that you’re not interested. Accepting any gifts, cards, etc. from him, will only send the wrong message. Remember, this whole thing started because you had a harmless conversation at a party, right?
Avoid Communication - Don’t assume that he’ll respond favorably to rational conversation. The attention just may backfire on you.
Document All Contacts and Incidents - Initially, and individually, they may not appear threatening or unusual enough to warrant it, but we’re looking for a pattern here. Stalking almost always begins as a harmless encounter. The more you record-keeping you do now, the easier it will be in the future to establish a threatening pattern, and identify an escalation in his actions. This can be invaluable information if you need to take legal action.
Report All Unusual or Suspicious Activity - Indications of mail tampering, trash cans opened, your stalker repeatedly turning up in places where you go and he normally wouldn’t (or shouldn’t) go.
Cut Ties - Depending upon your level of discomfort and your investment in these activities, you may decide that it’s best for a while to avoid doing the things and going to the places you’ve both got in common. Meet your friends at other hangouts, try new hobbies. Keep in mind, you’re not sacrificing your life, you’re preserving it when it gets to this step. Those other things will always be there to go back to later.
Self-Defense - Speaking of new hobbies, consider taking this opportunity to enroll in a self-defense class, kick-boxing, or if you feel threatened enough, arming yourself with pepper spray or a stun gun. Protect yourself from this dangerous person. Trust your instincts. They’re generally a reliable barometer for gauging the threat level, and choosing the proper level of response, if any. Common sense and a healthy sense of self-preservation will go a long way in helping you deal with your new “friend”.

This information was partially edited and taken from Home Alarm Monitoring.

Apartment Safety Tips for Single Women

As a woman that has lived in apartment complexes for many years, I thought I would share some safety tips for apartment living.

An apartment complex is like a small town where you have your friends, people whose faces just look familiar and some people that are complete strangers. There are places in the complex where you are more likely to gather with others. Some of these areas are; the office for the apartments, the club house, the laundry room, the pool/tennis courts area, the mailboxes section and the trash dumping area. Below is a breakdown of the different locations and the precautions you might consider:

Office Area
This is usually the safest place of the complex because there usually is more than one person present. It is where some checks are dropped off by renters or someone is complaining about their kitchen sink, etc. You still need to keep your guard up, in case someone for some reason gets angry, but usually the anger is targeted toward the office employee.

Mailbox Area
This area is one of the most dangerous and you should always keep your guard up! Criminals keep a close eye on mailbox sections of an apartment complex. Why? Because people are pretty predictable as to when they check their mail. Attackers like the fact that if they observe you for a few days, they can pretty much predict when you are going to check your mailbox. Usually people go to this section when they drive home from work. When you approach your mailbox, look around you. If there are a few people present, it is safer, but if you are the only one there, please be very cautious, especially at night. Always prepare your self defense product and have it in your hand and prepared to be used, prior to approaching the mailbox area.

Club House Area
Some complexes have club houses to rent them out for parties, but others have indoor recreational things such as pool and ping pong tables, pin ball machines, video games etc. Club houses can be very popular, especially on the weekends and in the evenings. Many times you will encounter people who are drinking alcoholic beverages that they brought from their apartment. It is always wise to go to club houses with a friend. Once in a while you will encounter a sore looser at a card game, for example, that can become violent and take it out on whomever is nearby. If you meet a new person, be careful on giving out your apartment number. Be aware also if someone is following you back to your apartment. If you are in fear of being followed, go to a friend's apartment, if you know they are home.

Tennis Court or Pool Area
The tennis court is pretty safe because you usually are accompanied by a tennis partner. The pool area is also pretty safe since it is very open and everyone is in plain site. Even when you are alone, an attacker will avoid an area that many people can see easily. Just make sure that when you leave the pool area, you prepare your self defense product ahead of time, prior to walking back to your apartment. This is important, because, since you are in plain site, that also means that a potential attacker or stalker could have also been looking at you. Keep in mind, that if you are going to the pool on a regular basis, try to go at different times of the day. This will make your schedule less predictable. If you are alone, try NOT to go at night.

Laundry Room Area
Here is another section of an apartment complex that is very dangerous. For one, it is noisy because of the machines. This noise can easily cover up someones scream or cry for help. For some reason, people feel they need to chat with whomever else is doing laundry. This can be a great tool for an assailant to get more information from you that you shouldn't have given to him in the first place! Be careful what you tell a complete stranger. Even if he is the cutest guy, and my, so meticulous with his neatly folded laundry! Impressive right? NO! Potential attackers play a caring role to make you feel comfortable and therefore letting your guard down. Again in this situation make sure you have a self defense product readily available.

Trash Dump Area
This area is of much concern because most people dump their trash at night, after dinner. If you don't want to wait until morning, please be very careful about this. If your trash dump area is dark, ask the apartment complex manager to install some kind of lighting around it. This may prove to be difficult but it is worth a try. You might want to consider asking a few female friends, that live there, to join in your request. Always take your self defense product with you and prepare it to be used. Always move cautiously toward the site and look around carefully as you approach. If you see someone that you do not recognize near it, maybe leaning against their car or smoking... Just turn around and go back home. You can always try later. It is better to be cautious than hurt or killed. If your trash is heavy, just set it down somewhere temporarily, where you can pick it up later.

If you want to include more helpful tips, please add your comment on this post!